We all journey through life’s highs and lows—moments when we feel invincible and times when we believe we’re sinking. Feeling overwhelmed, especially during downturns, is entirely natural. However, the secret lies not in avoiding these moments, but in how we confront them. As a child, my Dad introduced me to Rudyard Kipling’s insightful poem, “If.” I posted it on the door of my bedroom wardrobe, and many of its lines have resonated with me over the years. I often share these words with young people who feel overwhelmed by life’s pressures, drawing upon the poem and my own experiences to encourage them.
“If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same…”
Both victory and defeat, the peaks and troughs, are fleeting. They are ‘impostors’ because neither lasts forever. They may shape our journey, but they don’t define our destination.
In my youth, the lows seemed overwhelming. The notion that a difficult period would eventually end never crossed my mind. I remember being a young father, grappling with challenges at work, at home, and financially. Those days felt endless, and I believed they would shape the rest of my life. Now, at 57, I’ve come to realise that life is inherently cyclical. The rain does stop, and the sun eventually shines. Conversely, after the most beautiful days, storms may arise.
Instead of being disheartened by the lows or becoming complacent during the highs, I’ve learnt to find the middle ground. This is a place where, regardless of life’s turbulence, I remain grounded, knowing that change is the only constant.
So, to all the young souls reading this, remember: tough times don’t last, but resilient people do. Embrace the journey, learn from each phase, and always search for that middle ground. It’s there that you’ll discover your strength, balance, and unwavering spirit.
If-
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with wornout tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on”;
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings—nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run—
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!
